Celestial Themes

ALLY DETECTED

(Source: potatocrisp)

imagineyouricon:

Imagine your icon is sat next to you at a big family dinner and all the way through they have their hand on your upper thigh

#oops  

I think I had a religious experience watching Nicki Minaj’s Anaconda video on youtube?????????

My cat keeps touching my thigh to get my attention and whenever I pat my leg he doesn’t hop up so I go back to what I’m doing anD THEN HE DOES IT AGAIN

officialvarrictethras:

warning

do not, i repeat, do not

think about your favorite character’s face when they orgasm, especially after an agonizingly slow build of teasing and foreplay that lasts for hours

don’t imagine the relief in their eyes right before they close them

don’t imagine the sounds of their ecstasy as they finally hit that sweet spot

don’t imagine every line and muscle in their body tense and arching as they ride the aftershocks

don’t imagine the way they sag and pant and smile afterward, drawing their partner close to their sweat-slicked body

just don’t do that to yourself

(Source: wearealltourist)

friend: ever since i started having sex i think i might be into super kinky stuff
me: oh really like what
friend: idk my bf handcuffed me last night
me: whoa that really is kinky
me internally: weak

spadenightmaren:

what if your phobias are based off how you died in a past life

 Anonymous: One of the saddest and most hil- NO BITCH, the sad thing here is the fact that you're a stripper. If you want respect, maybe you should've graduated high school. 😂😂 when did stripping become a legitimate career?

rats-in-the-walls:

deadinmagazines:

stripperina:

Awww, you tried so hard, but unfortunately I can’t hear you over the sound of my debt-free college degree and massive disposable income.

image

Oh snap

BOOOOM

ricardobessa:

What if mermaids live really long - and the longer they live, the bigger they grow?

(I guess the bigger they grow, the harder it is for them to stick their torso and even their head out of the water. That’s why no one ever sees the big ones. And definitely never the huge ones.)

A bit late to the party, but here’s my contribution to Julie Dillon’s Catalog of Merfolk. I didn’t have nearly as much time to finish this as I wanted, but I have to be up in 5 hours so this will have to do!